I’m working on edits for the release of In Her Eyes in paperback. I’m aiming to hit publish by the end of the month. At the moment I have two chapters of edits left but am in need of a Beta reader for input on the flow of the story. There’s a spot that has me stuck and unsatisfied with the scene and dialogue. It’s been revamped form the original in order to be more YA friendly but changing others scenes has left this scene feeling off somehow. Kyler was the original “villain” of sorts,the one who scared Ari with his overpowering Alpha male attitude. But when Ari’s backstory came about her stepbrother, Andre became the main villain who has made Ari into the scared yet independence seeking girl she is today. However,after a few friends read it and suggested toning down Kyler’s strong personalty,so we wouldn’t give younger girls the notion that being treated in such a way was healthy. It was toeing the line between acceptable and aggressive behavior,closer to the line of verbal/mental abuse for comfort.So now I have Ari running scared from both boys and fearing their wrath for doing so but her fear of Kyler is irrational because he hasn’t shown her a reason to fear him yet in her head every guy is to be feared.So,I’m warring with leaving the scene as is and leaving the reader to realize her reaction is irrational on purpose,it’s part of her brokenness from what Andre put her through that leaves her paranoid or I can try tone down her fear of Kyler and just have her afraid of him being upset,hurt and not wanting her because she didn’t trust him.
So yeah that’s where I’m at tonight.And I don’t thing I’m gonna get pass this crossroad tonight,or should I say more like an impasse.C’est la via